Archive for: July, 2007

Dear iTunes,

Jul 31 2007 Published by Sarah, etc. under Fandom, Speechifying

Why do you have to be so stupid? Why does the procedure for adding music change every time I want to add some? Why can’t you ever find anything despite adding and importing and moving files and all other kinds of verbs? Is this about the DRM? I thought you were cooler than that, iTunes. I guess I was wrong.

I mean, I thought when I added the Snape/Lily fanmix with the custom artwork and all the Spiritualized songs, that we had an understanding. It is Snape and it is Lily. Snape and Lily. I am very close to the edge right now, iTunes, you know? The Echo & the Bunnymen song* I was using just isn’t cutting it, anymore. I mean, I haven’t listened to Spiritualized in years, but it’s gotta help, right? My heart hurts! SO STOP FUCKING WITH ME.

Bastards,
Sarah

*”The Killing Moon” (Fate / Up against your will / Through thick and thin / He will wait until / You give yourself to him)

One response so far

I Got Nothin’

Jul 30 2007 Published by Sarah, etc. under Confession

For a while there, I was doing well with five entries a week. That appears to be over, but I’ll keep trying. I think the end of Deathly Hallows got to me more than I thought it would, or than I thought it did, because every time I go to blog about anything, I just want to type, big as life, “Fuck you, JKR! Fuck you backward!”

Except I don’t really mean it. Yeah, there was a lot of wandering around in the woods and quite a few characters died. And there were some gaping plot holes, but I’ve sucked back enough kool-aid to be able to justify those or make up my own reasoning. I cannot in any way inhabit the sense of fannish entitlement that let’s me tell an author she was wrong. I cannot believe people that can. So telling her and her zillion dollars to get bent is just plain petty.

Meanwhile, here on the lowest part of the high road, I’m really, really sad. I’m just down and blue. I try to keep busy with manual labor like cleaning major appliances and digging in the dirt. Writing is much harder, as it requires me to sit and think. When I’m cleaning the fridge, I can think things like, “Dang. This fridge is really dirty. Water very hot. Ow.” Or when I’m outside I can think, “These coxcomb better not die like the last ones.” Plus, the neighborhood kids hang out and we can talk about stuff like Transformers and how great the library is.

But waking up every morning and wondering how to communicate with the whole world via blog makes me tired and sad. This is me, tired and sad, and blogging for the sake of it.

9 responses so far

One Giant Step for Prison Reform

Jul 25 2007 Published by Sarah, etc. under Geekery

Y’all, we have elizabeth of Pretty Helmet to thank for this: inmates in a Korean Prison doing the whole Thriller routine:

I think you’ll have to agree that this is, in fact, the awesomest thing on the whole internet. I don’t know how she finds things like this, but I am so glad I can IM her.

4 responses so far

Magic City HP and the Deathly Hallows Discussion Group

Jul 25 2007 Published by Sarah, etc. under Fandom

When: Thursday, July 25, 2007, 6:30 p.m.
Where: Five Points Grill, Southside
Who: Everybody!
How: Rowling-esque adverb of your choice (sycophantically!)

Everyone is welcome. Please send me an email or leave a comment so that I know approximately how many seats to ask for. This is going to be a simple, come and go as you please affair, with no set agenda. Come with questions or gripes or love letters.

And if you haven’t read the book and just want to hang out with people for a beer, that’s good too.

Pass this info, on, please!

2 responses so far

Si Hoc Legere Scis Nimium Eruditionis Habes

Jul 24 2007 Published by Sarah, etc. under Lexpionage

Here’s a list of Latin Phrases Everyone Should Know. You probably already know them all, or at least the shorter ones. Nevertheless, it’s fun to review them and to try to learn the new ones, i.e. (ha!):

Cuius est solum eius est usque ad coelum et ad inferos.

Trying to put that together from my limited Latin knowledge that’s now over 10 years old (when did that happen?) I’d have been all, something is…. is to sky and to earth? And I’d have been in the same zip code as right.

One phrase I think is missing is “quid pro quo.” Or do you think they’re assuming everybody knows that phrase?

Obviously I have nothing to talk about. What do you all want to talk about?

2 responses so far

Matthew 6:19 – 24

Jul 23 2007 Published by Sarah, etc. under Fandom, Recovering English Major

It’s over and I’m still a little sideways from it. Some of my predictions came true, but most of them didn’t. And there were many, many tears. I’m pretty sure that my heart broke completely in two at one point, only to be knit slowly and surely back together by the end of the next chapter. And of the crying I did, some of it was from happiness– there were a few brilliant scenes where the decade of world-construction paid off in full and you get to see so many characters shining.

Let’s get together and have a round table, shall we? All Birmingham bloggers and sundry others invited? How’s 6:30 or 7:00 p.m. this coming Thursday, July 26? Let’s get together some place like Five Points Grill and talk about all its different aspects. Other suggestions accepted, if Thursday isn’t good for you. Let everybody know and I’ll start sending emails.

It would be the same at the end of the journey,
If you came at night like a broken king,
If you came by day not knowing what you came for,
It would be the same, when you leave the rough road,
And turn behind the pig-stye to the dull facade
And the tombstone. And what you thought you came for
Is only a shell, a husk of meaning
From which the purpose breaks only when it is fulfilled
If at all. Either you had no purpose
Or the purpose is beyond the end you figured
And is altered in fulfillment.

We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.

Quick now, here, now, always–
A condition of complete simplicity
(Costing not less than everything)
And all shall be well and
All manner of thing shall be well
When the tongues of flame are in-folded
Into the crowned knot of fire
And the fire and the rose are one.

T.S. Eliot, Little Gidding

5 responses so far

Potterdamerung

Jul 20 2007 Published by Sarah, etc. under Fandom

This entry nearly as long as actual opera by which title has been punned.

I had to write down my last thoughts and feelings and predictions. It’s all just thrown together, because wow can I ever not concentrate. But read through, (or skim, you know, whatever) and let me know when you think. And maybe we’ll revisit in a couple weeks to see how very wrong I was about most of this. Or hopefully right. And I will wait a few weeks to talk much more about it, unless of course Snape dies, in which case, I will talk about it at length and constantly, so you know, caveat lector. Or not. I might stop talking and typing all together. Regardless, after this is all over, I have plenty of other big deal things to talk about.*

Harry James Potter

I would be really disappointed if Harry defeated Voldemort, and lived to become the most famous wizard of all time, Minister of Magic, Defense Against the Dark Arts instructor, and then Headmaster at Hogwarts. Luckily, I don’t think that that will happen. If Harry dies, I won’t be disappointed, especially if he dies, taking out Voldemort and the evil that he manufacture with overwhelming, all-encompassing love, the “power the Dark Lord knows not.” Yes, it’s very much a crucifixion analogy and thus far in the series, Dumbledore has been the Christ-figure, but it would be alright. If he does live, which would be great, I’d be happiest if he married Ginny Weasley, had nine kids, and had a long, fulfilling career developing new charms for Honeydukes.

Tom Riddle: Lord Voldemort

Should die, natch. But it’d be great if he could die knowing just how wrong he was. And if that’s not possible, die knowing just how hard, and for how long, Snape betrayed him.

Other Characters

Of all the secondary and tertiary characters, Ron and Hermione should survive. If one of them doesn’t, it’ll be Ron—he’s spent the entire series sacrificing himself for Harry in one way or another and that could legitimately continue. Think of the fight to the Philosopher’s Stone in the first book: Ron doesn’t shine until it’s time to strategize. And then, when he does, he wins the Wizard’s Chess game, and handily, by sacrificing himself so that Harry can win, while keeping Hermione completely out of harms way. Hermione will survive because Harry’s just not that bright and needs someone to do this thinking for him.

The rest of the Weasleys must live, though I don’t think anybody would miss Percy, nor would anybody be heartbroken if, say, Charlie died. Poor Charlie—the superfluous Weasley. If the fanfic authors are borne out and Arthur Weasley becomes Minister of Magic, I will eat my hat. I will go buy a hat and then eat it.

Remus Lupin has to survive, if only so that Harry has some lingering connection to his parents. And so must Tonks, and then she and Remus have to get married and have a series of increasingly vibrantly colored but strangely mellow babies. Anybody else could be cannon fodder and that would be okay. It would be very dramatic if Hagrid or Minerva McGonagall died, as they each have reason to revenge themselves against Voldemort personally (I will bet you a dollar McGonagall is the closet Tom Riddle ever came to having a lover), but my heart would not break in two. It would be exciting if Death Eaters captured Trelawney and Voldemort broke her brain trying to legilimize the full prophecy out of her.

Some of the students should die too, for dramatic effect. Seamus Finnegan maybe, or Justin Finch-Fletchly. Crabbe OR Goyle, but not both. Pansy Parkinson OR Millicent Bulstrode, but not both. Frankly, I’m irrationally attached to Millicent because of how wonderful she is in fanfiction, so she needs to stick around too—and maybe get some plot.

Luna Lovegood and Neville Longbottom both need to live. I think they’ll play major parts in the Final Battle (if there is such a thing) and I’ll talk about Neville’s a bit more below. But they both need to live and then get married and have the most brilliant, sincere, genuine children ever.

Severus Snape, The Half-Blood Prince

This is the big deal. This is where all my concentration will be focused, and my primary reason for reading the book. As wonderful as Rowling’s universe is, and as exciting as the larger narrative is, at this point, Severus Snape is the most compelling character, bar none. Everything, seriously—EVERYTHING—will hinge on what side he chooses to act for. The consummate Slytherin (I wouldn’t be surprised if Rowling invented Snape, then created the defining traits for Slytherin House based on him) he is, and ever will be, on his own side. But for over 15 years, in the books, he’s been acting for both factions, the Death Eaters and the Order of the Phoenix, in various and secret capacities. When last we saw him, he was fleeing, to the bosom of his true master or into the deepest possible cover, depending on how you look at things. And what he chooses to do, and say, and even think now, will be what really determines the fate of the wizarding world—not any actions of the Boy Who Lived.

I believe Snape fights for the light. That when he “spun Dumbledore a tale of deepest woe” that it was genuine. He was life indebted to James Potter, and deeply, secretly, shamefully in love with Lily Evans Potter; and, once he realized what he’d done by revealing the prophecy to Voldemort, he went to Dumbledore, chastened and resolved to be reborn good, if not nice. I firmly believe that he found out, maybe only moments ahead of time as Pettigrew announced to the assembled Death Eaters the secret-kept location of Godric’s Hollow, that Voldemort planned to murder the Potters and was compelled (as in literally, a compulsion made him Apparate) to go and warn them. James answered the door and the first words out of Snape’s mouth were, “Black betrayed you.” James proceeded to argue the point, giving Voldemort time to catch up. Voldemort saw Snape there (which is the real thrust behind his “one who has left me forever” statement), resolved to death with him later, and proceeded to kill James and Lily before dying himself. Snape is the person caring for Harry in the missing 24 hours, while Dumbledore sorts out Hagrid and Sirius tries to kill Peter Pettigrew before winding up in Azkaban.

I also believe that Severus didn’t kill Dumbledore so much as he said the words “avada kedavra” while he stopped healing them. Nearly all of Snape’s First Year Speech and subsequent interrogation of Harry has been used for one plot point or another. So when he says, “I can teach you how to bottle fame, brew glory, and even stopper death” we’re to understand that that’s what he’s doing. Dumbledore says that Snape saved him from the curse that’s withered his hand; he didn’t cure him so much as prevented the rest of his body from dying the way his hand did. Snape keeps him (and however many other people, like Katie Bell and Ron Weasley) alive that year because of his utter brilliance at Potions and Defense) alive for the remainder of the year so that he can teach Harry what he needs to know. And then, at the moment of truth, when it’s kill the only person in the world who trusts him, or die himself while Draco’s soul is marred, Snape stops healing Dumbledore and flees, the entire time trying to save Draco’s life, minimize student casualties, and teach Harry the rest of what he needs to know as fast as he can.

I think Snape will spend the majority of Deathly Hallows sending all the information to the Order he possibly can. Tonks proves in Half-Blood Prince that one’s patronus can change in times of great emotional turmoil. Killing your mentor, father figure, and again, probably the only person in the whole world who believes in you is about as tumultuous as it gets and it’ll change Snape’s patronus. I bet its new form will be a phoenix and that everyone will believe Dumbledore is somehow communicating from beyond the grave. He’ll give them all the information they need to find the horcruxes, destroy them, and engage the final battle. Snape will stand then, at Voldemort’s left hand and wait.

Couple ways to go from here: many people think he’ll sacrifice himself. That he’ll leap in front of a killing curse meant for Harry, martyring himself and giving Harry and opening to kill Voldemort. I would HATE that. Dying a martyr might lead to posthumous redemption. Or it might lead to Ron spitting on his corpse and history subsequently ignoring him, because Harry isn’t the most generous kid ever. Snape might also be genuinely evil and Harry will have to kill him too, right before he kills Voldemort. That won’t happen though.

Ideally, at the point of confrontation, Snape will reveal himself to the Order as the person who has given them all their information. Voldemort will be flabbergasted and the moment it takes Ron and Hermione to incite Harry to act on the existing plan, based on Snape’s secret information, will be enough to end Voldemort and win the war. And then Snape will be arrested and put on trial so that there will be a public record of every amazing, noble deed he ever did in the war against Voldemort and Harry will have no choice but to apologize. Snape can then, depending on what he wants to do, go back to Hogwarts as the Defense professor, or go into business for himself. Marriage and children optional, but unlikely.**

Secondary, excruciatingly unlikely scenario puts Snape in the same place, but Voldemort manages to kill Harry. In the confusion, Snape manages to get Neville to act, mitigating the circumstances of the prophecy and Snape’s own complicity in the Potter’s deaths. Harry is the Boy Who Lived, but Neville is the Boy Who Triumphed.

At any rate, Snape works for the good, the light, the Order. And does not turn into a martyr, a sop, or any other sort of non-Slytherin nonsense in the meantime. He gets the respect he deserves, and craves. And I am vindicated in years and years of crazed fangirling.

I’m shutting all my computers off sometime around dinner-time today, but I will check back through the afternoon because I am genuinely interested in what everybody thinks. For better or worse, I’ll see you all on the other side.

*No, I’m not pregnant.
** I am already married, you see.

12 responses so far

WANT

Jul 19 2007 Published by Sarah, etc. under Fandom, Geekery

I would be going out of my mind with anticipation if I hadn’t found lolfirefly. Yes, lol-meme + Firefly. Equals AWESOMETACULAR. Observe:

Zoe's Patronus is a mare's leg pistol at close range!

A zerg rush with boobs.

Both images are by Jessa, who founded the community.

If that doesn’t take your mind of the fate of Severus Snape, I don’t know what will.

3 responses so far

Meanwhile, These Pigs Are Looking Very Aerodynamic

Jul 18 2007 Published by Sarah, etc. under Fandom

So, there are Harry Potter spoilers out there– this is hardly news. There will be no spoilers in this particular entry, though; only talk of them. Mugglenet has obtained and reposted a Scholastic Books press release that claims to have found the source of the spoiler leak. And promptly taken action against it. Evidently, an online retailer received their books and just went ahead and shipped them out to distributors, who then shipped them on to customers. This is the best part:

We are also making a direct appeal to the Harry Potter fans who bought their books from DeepDiscount.com and may receive copies early requesting that they keep the packages hidden until midnight on July 21st.

It’s so rare to see that level of optimism anymore. It’s like rainbows puking rainbows, thinking that you’re going to get people to hold the books in their hot little hands and promptly hide it! Until midnight, July 21, and then open it with the rest of the world. I’m flabbergasted. If they ask nicely the people will put away the precious, precious book? In a PR sense, I’m sure they had no choice but to say that, so what should we be reading here? “Oops!” or “If you early-book-getting motherfuckers cause us to loose so much as a dime of magic revenue!”

Man, if my copy showed up tomorrow, I’d be on page one inside of two minutes while calling everybody I know and asking if they want to come over and read it aloud round robin. Right after I wiped all the rainbows off my chin.

3 responses so far

Fangirl: The Agony and the Ecstasy

Jul 17 2007 Published by Sarah, etc. under Confession, Fandom

Every morning lately I wake up and think, “Something important is happening this weekend.” And it really takes me a minute to remember what it is. I honestly sit there and go, “I have plans. Who do I have plans with? What?” And then it all comes to me in a rush– this weekend’s plan is to read like I’ve rarely read before, to devour Deathly Hallows and try to remember the devouring so I can look back and cherish the memory of that first read, the beginning of the end and the end of the end.

Lately I’ve been feeling vaguely guilty about things, wanting to sort of apologize to the world at large for my enthusiasm, my excitement, because it’s starting to overwhelm people. People don’t do passion very well, and at this point, it would take every bit of my energy to keep mine in so I don’t. I just go with it. I babble, and squee, and talk, and rant and rave. And people look worried and back away slowly.

And I feel guilty, because the vehemence of my enthusiasm exists because it’s young. I only read my first HP book about three years ago, if that. I started it on Superbowl Sunday 2004, maybe? Finished The Dark Tower VII: The Dark Tower, cried for a while, took my temperature (I was ill), and then picked up Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone. And read the next four books in two weeks, stopping frequently to nap and go to doctor’s appointments. So I can’t help but thinking that there are people out there who would love to wring my neck, fandom neophyte that I am. Just like I would’ve cheerfully clobbered all those “Browncoats” who got to see the early screenings of Serenity only having discovered the DVDs two weeks before.

And there’s that feeling again. The feeling that I have something important to do this weekend, but the details are hazy. Like I forgot, for a moment, that there’s a dam in my chest, holding back all this intense ardor, and it is slowly, but surely, cracking.

18 responses so far

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