Free for All Friday 29
Sometimes, when it comes to FFaF, I get concerned about quantity/quality ratios. Swan dive in with me, please!
- Here’s the fastest way to hull strawberries.
- Wine now cheaper than water in Australia. I’m fixin’ to move, y’all. I mean, I plan on packing house down under, mates. Or something like that.
- A common bias among the smart is to overestimate how smart everyone else is. I know I do this. I always I assume I am the floor of any given set of intellects. This backfires 99% of the time.
- This is what a martyr looks like.
- The Nerdapalooza 2009 line up.
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I Still Hate You, Sarah Palin is a wonderful satire. I hope.
Not only were we offended at the sheer effrontery of McCain’s pick: How dare the Republicans proffer this déclassée piece of Wasilla trailer trash whose only claim to fame was that she didn’t exercise her right to choose? Where were her degrees from Smith or Barnard, her internships at PETA, the Brookings Institution, or the Young Pioneers? We were also outraged that the Stupid Party had just nominated a completely unqualified candidate nobody had ever heard of, a first-term governor of Alaska whose previous experience consisted of a small-town mayoralty. As opposed to our guy, Barry Soetoro of Mombasa, Djakarta, and Honolulu, a first-term senator nobody had ever heard of, whose previous experience had been as a state senator (D., Daley Machine) in Illinois. After eight long, illegitimate, lawless years of &*^%BUSH$#@! tyranny, how dare you contest this election?
- McDonald’s doesn’t give a fuck!
It will kill you. It will kill us all. You have got to try it.
- Seven reasons global warming is total bullshit. As far as I’m concerned, debate was over when The Goracle dropped motherfucking Godwin’s law.
- Self-help makes you feel worse. Though I’m kind of surprised they had to do an official study. I mean, look at the average population of Oprah viewers. They’re miserable.
- Monkeys recognize bad grammar. But no one has been able to pin down their style preferences.
- BACK THE FUCK UP IS THAT BRENT SPINER?!
- Spike/Angel! And Caleb, Warren, Willow/DarkWillow, Xander, The Gentlemen, Clem, Elvis and some other guys. Still trying to figure out who Buffy’s bridesmaids are.
- From Chez, How to have more self-discipline. If you were a Greg the Bunny fan, I have a very funny joke that goes here. But nobody else really was, so I’m keeping it to myself. Actually, I’m keeping it to myself because it’s not all that funny. But nobody would get it anyway, so how would you know? You wouldn’t! It involves snowballs. DISCIPLINE! IS THE POINT!
- Is this awesome? ARMADILLO FUCKHOUSE! Y/Y?
- A short write-up on the long history of the letter G.
- This is the first time you’ll see this. I am going to link to it over and over. This is the beginning of the end of the First Amendment. You thought the Patriot Act was bad? You ain’t seen nothin’ yet.
- It’s okay to have body hair! Please knock it off with the manscaping! And any other scaping. It makes me want to shop shaving in solidarity.
- Stupid Mail Online jinxing us. If they call it “the stupidest internet craze yet” someone is just going to have to go out and invent one that’s stupider. They say pointless; I say stupid. I’m writing from a place of peevery what with the free speech and the hairy men.
- From Doc, massive robot rises over Tokyo. And does not immediately begin destroying it!
- In case of fire, do not use Twitter!
- From the American Issues project: When it comes to Capitalism vs. Socialism, who’s really mean?
- Thomas Jefferson, and his buddies, were really into cryptography. Really, really. Wow.
Mr. Patterson estimated that the potential combinations to solve the puzzle was “upwards of ninety millions of millions.” After explaining this in his letter, Mr. Patterson wrote, “I presume the utter impossibility of decyphering will be readily acknowledged.”
- It’s Alan Tudyk Tuesday! Or it was. Lady can’t spell “y’all” but anybody who thinks Tuesday is a good enough reason to post pics of Alan Tudyk is okay by me.
- Weird Al apologizes for tweeting a semi-NSFW image of Bill O’Reilly with gradients and text effects.
Bacon motherfucker, do you speak it?
- Bacon caramels
- Pig Candy. Hold up tho:
After asking google I found out that pig candy is a very popular snack in the states. Well, I wonder why it isn’t as popular in Germany.
Popular in the States? Am I going to the wrong parties? I mean, I really don’t go to any parties. Is this what kids these days do at parties? Ritalin and candied bacon?
- Bacon bread used to make a BGT with cheese.
- Bacon stromboli
- Bacon-wrapped cheese-stuffed jalapenos
- More from the Vosage’s people: Bacon chocolate chip pancake mix. On the one hand, yay efficiency. But on the other, I’m still very suspicious of these people!
- Bacon, but gross! Would you eat that? I wouldn’t.
- So here’s a Bacon Palette Cleanser: What you gonna do with all that ass?
The Sarah Palin article was the most shrill, whiny, hypocritical and hysterical pout-fest I’ve read in a long time. In his blatant attempt to canonize the martyr as St. Sarah of the Frozen North, Kahane comes off sounding (ironically?) just like a bleeding-heart liberal.
Just my two cents.
Also, the article about the H.R. 1966 on atlasshrugs lists only the Democrat sponsors, and not the two Republican sponsors (http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h1966/show).
I mean, the amendment is clearly a ridiculously misguided effort–presumably to protect children from cyberbullying. But the article takes what could have been a legitimate protest against censorship into a partisan diatribe against a trumped-up liberal masterplan for world domination. Talk about inconvenient truths…
The atlasshrugs article = bathed in fail.
Comment by Philosaur on July 10, 2009 at 9:02 am
Sorry, Sarah. I really mean to make some positive comments, too, but got stuck on the negative stuff.
I’m getting overwhelmed by bacon! So many ways to enjoy this versatile victual, and so little time…
Comment by Philosaur on July 10, 2009 at 9:11 am
As if I needed another damn reason to move to Australia. Think they need rocket scientists there?
Also, ‘armadillo fuckhouse’ sounds like a heat colloquialism. Like “It’s hotter than an armadillo fuckhouse in here”. I think I’ll steal it.
Comment by Apollo on July 10, 2009 at 9:47 am
I think that he meant for it to sound that way, Philosaur. Particularly after Jonah Goldberg told her to STFU for the same reasons you did. But let’s step over to Camille Paglia’s fair-play ideas about Democrat vs. Republican. Does her leaving out the two Republicans, and getting screedy in her own way, make the bill any less wrong? There’s some cutting off of noses to spite faces there.
Apollo, it’s a Skillzy shoutout, too, from his popular (with me) expression, “ALLIGATOR FUCKHOUSE!”
Comment by Sarah, etc. on July 10, 2009 at 10:14 am
I don’t see where Jonah Goldberg told her to “STFU”: http://article.nationalreview.com/?q=ZGE1OTE3OTFhMmZkOWE5MDQ5MmZhZTFjMzE2MjcxNTM=
I do see where one of Mr. Goldberg’s readers told him to “STFU”: http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=MjdlZDRkNGUxOGY2NTA2NzQ0MGU1YzlmNzBhMmY0ZDU=
Did I misread something?
Comment by Philosaur on July 10, 2009 at 12:04 pm
No, I meant that first one. He calls her an over the top whiner and tells her to try harder, that she’s lacking in leadership characteristics if not abilities, and that she needs to step back and get some learning before she tries anything else.
Comment by Sarah, etc. on July 10, 2009 at 12:45 pm
I juat had dinner with a bunch of Americans and they all thought it was a TRAGEDY that I did not eat bacon in the States. We never managed our breakfast plans! CLEARLY I MUST RETURN! xxx
Comment by Zooey Glass on July 10, 2009 at 6:30 pm
GAWD DAMN! How did we not manage to have a bacon orgy?! Clearly we were too focused on conversation, fanfiction, and eyeshadow. You will need to return, post haste, pork fest ready! :D
Comment by Sarah, etc. on July 11, 2009 at 4:41 pm
The girl in the Buffy comic is Tara. She’s got a bullet wound in her chest and she’s talking to Warren.
Comment by Poptart on July 13, 2009 at 3:45 pm